Ayame's Daughter, Is, Uh, Scary!
by Shh - my pen name is pen name
Summary: Ayame has recently found his long-lost daughter and noticed she has strange eating habits. One day he comes home only to find her cooking a dinner that will scar the Sohma's for life...
1. Ayame's Daughter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket, Natsuki Takaya does... I do own Kaitlin.**

**Authors Note: I must ask you do not acquire Kaitlin's eating habits...it is probably not entirely healthy. Review if you find the time, thanks! =)  
**

**Warning: This may be disturbing to some people...**

" La, la, la" Ayame Sohma sang while joyously skipping through his garden. It was a gorgeous day; the sun shone brightly and the wind sang a light-calming breeze although something was…astray, _different_. He paused and peered around curiously before it came to him. Where were the garden snakes, bunnies, and his Pomeranian? I wonder if my long-lost-now-found-daughter would know. Yes, yousee since he had found her she gave him a strange impression. She seemed _rather…strange. _Actually, they had discovered Kaitlin sitting by a duck pond chewing on a _live_ frog. She down right refused to eat anything he cooked, he was a good cook, but instead preferred spiders and raw chicken… he couldn't get her to eat anything normal.

When he entered the house a putrid smell collided with his nostrils. As he opened his eyes, he regretted ever entering the house. The shades had been pulled creating a disturbing aura. There in the kitchen stood Kaitlin stirring a pot of blood red water, at the top floated defunct garden snakes. I stared at them with tear filled eyes, my kin. She tasted a spoon of the '_soup_' before putting down the spoon and picking up a frying pan full of oil and spiders. She turned to stare at me with wide, deranged eyes. I looked away now to see that from the curtain hung flapping songbirds, needle and thread strung through their eyes. I turned to look back at her only to realize she wasn't there and find her sitting atop the fridge. Kaitlin was suffocating a rabbit watching it flail the its legs before dying. She then proceeded to slowly skin it, then taking the skin and tossing it onto the frying pan, staring, and then hopping of the fridge.

" _Hello, father…__" _Kaitlin said. She picked up a gun and before I could even breathe, she had shot my Pomeranian, which now hung limply from a rope. I let out a cry and she watched with amused eyes. Grabbing a steak knife, she cut open its stomach and pulled out the organs and brought them to her face breathing in.

"_W-w-what ar-re you doing_? I asked her horrified_._

" _Making dinner…"_she said lightly, maliciously, disturbed_._

" _Y-you plan t-to eat… this__?" _I asked alarmed_._

" _of course. And, I invited all your friends__."_She hummed. I stared at her and was about to reply when the door opened revealing all the Sohma's, Kagura in her zodiac form, frozen in the door way.

" _Here, piggy-piggy, I bet you enjoy being bacon__."_She sang slyly. Tohru screamed and was about to run when Kyo grabbed her arm.

" _What's your Problem?"_Kyo asked angrily_._

" _Care to donate some flesh?"_and with this final sentence everyone ran out the door screaming. For the first time everyone agreed; Kaitlin was much scarier than Akito.


	2. Hatori's Daughter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket, Natsuki Takaya does.**

**Authors Note: Hi! Thank you so much for reading this story! This is in no way an encouragement for drinking salt - which is dangerous - or to make fun of loud people, Hatori, Ayame or anyone who feels the description matches them! Hope you liked it! =) - Yours, TheNecromancerSorceress**

" OMG, I'M HOME!" screamed Justine. Hatori sighed as he heard his long lost daughter announce (more like scream) that she had arrived home. He had hoped the other day that her loud, stupid, and rambunctious behavior had been due to some unknown Starbucks trip- apparently it hadn't. Her voice a scream- which would give him a migraine worse then Ayame could create-, her stupidity would remind him of Shigure- which would cause him too worry about what he was up to- and her rambunctious behavior was worse then Momiji after he feasted on a buffet of candy. This would be and interesting parent-to-child experiment. Maybe he should try to find out how her field trip to the aquarium was.

" So Justine, how was your field trip to the local aquarium today?" he questioned.

" OH MY GOD! IT WAS SO STUPID, ESPECIALLY THE FRICKEN SEA HORSES! I MEAN, FISH ARE STUPID ENOUGH, RIGHT. SO WHY THE HELL WAS THE SEA HORSE BORN! I WAS SO BORED, SO I GRABBED ONE OUT OF A TANK AND THREW IT AT THE WALL!" I inwardly cringed as she said this. We would probably (are going to) have an interesting personality clash.

" AND OH YEAH! YA' KNOW HOW DOCTORS ALWAYS SAY NOT TO DRINK SALT? WELL I DID CAUSE _NO ONE_ LISTENS TO _DOCTORS_! YA' KNOW? I MEAN THEY'RE SUCH FRICKEN PRUDES AND IDIOTS THEY SHOULD ALL JUST DIE! I'D SHOOT EM' ALL AND THEN GO GET DRUNK AND LAY THAT HOT BROWN HAIRED GUY WHO WAS HERE YESTERDAY! " Okay we are definitely going to have a personality clash. Wait did she just say she wanted to sleep with _Shigure_!

" SO I DRANK ALL THE SALT AND THEN I PUKED! I PUKED ON THEESE FOUR BITCHES WHO SNITCHED ON ME FOR PISSIN' ON THEIR BACKPACKS! ANYWAY YOU KNOW HOW SALTS WHITE? I PUKED...WHITE! HAHAHAH! She finished her sentence by cracking up while I just sat there in horror. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ayame (in snake form) trying to slither towards me without Justine seeing. I was about to catch him when...

" OH MY FUCKEN GOD A SNAKE! COOL! I'M GONNA GIVE IT A CONCUSSION! And with that, to my dismay, she picked up Ayame and through him across the room where his head proceeded to collide with the wall. The limp and unconscious body slid down the wall and lie there on the floor. I stared at it a minute before gathering my composure.

" Uhh..." I said flustered. ", Justine you never through snakes at walls! Uhh.. Go to your room and stay there until I tell you otherwise!" I said trying my best to sound _just_ angry instead of angry _and_ worried.

" WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? NEVER? I JUST DID SO IT IS_ EVER_ NOT NEVER! BESIDES, THE WALL HIT THE SNAKE IN THE HEAD! I WAS JUST TRYING TO TEACH IT HOW TO FLY!" Justine stated indignantly.

Unlike what most parents believed, I had the feeling this parenting experiment would go by to _slowly _not quickly_. S_igh.

**Authors Note: Hi! Thank you so much for reading this story! This is in no way an encouragement for drinking salt - which is dangerous - or to make fun of loud people, Hatori, Ayame or anyone who feels the description matches them! Hope you liked it! =) - Yours, TheNecromancerSorceress**


	3. Kureno's Son

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket Natsuki Takaya does.**

** Authors Note: This story is meant as humor and not to highlight the _"fun"_ of getting high. Please note that fun is in quotations and I hope you get the giggles! Message me if you find the time!**

Stephen, oh god the kid had issues, Kureno sighed. Just the other day Akito has asked him, what the kid was smoking and although he had never actually _seen_ the kid smoking Akito had a point. The kid just always seemed high. Maybe he should check oh him… Ever since he had found long-lost-son-Stephen he had tried to respect his space, but hoped to become closer to him. Of course bonding would be easier if he wasn't so… well, high.

Upon walking into the living room, he found Stephen hugging a pot of purple flowers and smiling. Was he_ talking_ to it?

" Hello Unicorn, how have you been doing? Aww, you flatter me! Shall we go to dinner?" I stared, this was weird. " No, I don't want to invite Mario he's doing shrooms', that's so five minutes ago! Fine we'll invite Harry Potter, but not Sponge Bob. Oh I'm so happy!" Stephen sang happily before grinning and biting off one of the flowers.

" Your fur is so sexy and smooth, my little unicorn!" Stephen sighed in '_love_'. I slowly walked forward and gently took the plant out of his hand placing it on the coffee table while Stephen tried to bite my hand. He then flopped down on the couch staring at the ceiling fan before turning to look at me.

" Omg, my daughter has returned!" He cried out.

" Huh?" I asked greatly confused.

"Daddy's missed you!" he screamed flinging his arms around my neck. About now the door opened and Akito walked in staring out us, well more like glaring.

" And my daughters twin brother returns! And he brought me a somkeable kimono!" Stephen said staring at Akito with joyous eyes and then ripped off the sleeve of his/her kimono. He proceeded to roll it and then lit up, afterwards… fainting.

" What was that? I told you he was high, but did you do anything! NO, YOU DIDN'T! If I could faint from annoyance…"

"_Then you'd never be awake…_" I muttered before turning back to her as she continued nagging.

**Author Note: Hello and thank you so much for reading! I must say though that this story is purely meant for humor and not to encourage drug abuse. I hope you enjoyed and please rate or message if you can! **

**Yours- TheNecromancerSorceress =)**


End file.
